On the Perfection of Guar
By Anonymous

There truly are few creatures across Tamriel that can be proclaimed to be the peak of creation. Some might claim this of the mighty dragons of legend. I have even heard it claimed that the eternal lich can be classified as perfect. This is all nonesense of course!

The humble yet magestic guar is the ONLY creature across all of Nirn that can truly claim such a title. The case should not even need to be made and should be self evident, but I shall do so anyways as it is so simple.

It all begins with their loving a docile nature. So incredible is the demeanor of this fantastic being that it embraces all who come upon it! This demonstrates the ability of the guar to see through to the very soul of man and mer alike and understand that there is purity and kindness in all of us.

Their gorgeous appearance also can not go understated. One glance at this wonderous creature will rapidly correct even the most sour of moods! From is appealing and universally loved skin tone and texture, to it's soulful and innocent eyes. Truly a gift to us mortals from the Gods, and one that we're clearly not worthy of might I add.

So advanced is it form that it's arms are of the perfect size. The humble guar needs not the use of long arms, for it has no enemies it needs to fend off! All creatures big and small love their eternal friend and companion, the guar.

Lastly I will note the soothing and melodious tone of its purring. So generous is the guar that it produces a sound that calms all who hear it and can be used quite effectively to drift even the most addled and busy mind to sleep.

With all of this being stated and being made perfectly clear, can anyone ever doubt the perfection of such a grand being? Can anyone ever attempt to supplant it with another "perfect" being? I think not!